... dia , dia, dan dia ...

pgn suka ma orang tapi gag mungkin dilanjutin kekagumannya,
sayang dan disayangi seseorang lain tapi kayaknya ga mungkin bersatu,
disayangi tapi belum bs menyayangi seseorang lain lagi...
hmmmm...

seems like the harder choices to think rite now..

so what next?

just praying and hoping,
there is a way..
best way to get at the best place..

terus mencari dan membuka diri sepertinya ide yang bagus..

terima kasih buat AW yang udah ngasi sesuatu yang berharga..
walau harus pisah...
terima kasih buat kakak-kakak baruku,
terima kasih buat AK, karna sempet hadir untuk dikagumi tp g kesampaian,
hehe
dan yang spesial,,
terima kasih buat saudara2ku yg tetep ada buat aku..
terima kasih buat temen2ku dan sahabat2ku yg masih care ma aku..
terima kasih buat ibu dan dimas yg tetep support aku..
terima kasih buat alm. bapak yg masih aku rasain helaian kasih sayangmu bapak..
terima kasih terima kasih terima kasih buat Tuhan Yesusku...
:)

trip to solo - jogja

wad a busy-friday-day two days ago..
DITA, NINDHA, BELLA, GALUH, WIWIN, ME, ESTU
were going to Solo and Jogja..
the first post was my house and we were trying to take a rest for a while..
then we went to Grandmall for sightseeing and windows shopping :)
REALLY REALLY CROWDED ..
hufff...


we went to NGARSOPURO after we had bought several things not important ..
hahahaha
we took a lot pictures in the TRIWINDU's past street..
AMAZING!!!
that was a word that came up for the first time in my head..
where have I been??!!!
i stepped there for the first time since this heritage place was built last year..
woooooowww...

next we were back home..
and the shocking-info I'd had..
my young ex-lawyer and ex-special persons came..
SHOCKED!!
that was a thing I could express..
and it was the ADDITIONAL INGREDIENTS in my trip..
and yya you know what I would have done..
SAD,CRIED,and made a stupid but made me calm down..
I GAVE UP for a moment..
but, let's continue the trip..

in the next day,
we went to jogja by PRAMEX whereas 2 of my friends haven't ever gone by train..
(Bella and Nindha-red)
hehehe

we were walking along Mataram Street and Malioboro Street..
hohooho..
BUT,
the ridiculous thing happened,
we thought the train which would go to Solo would have been at 2.40 pm..
but do you know what?????
when I bought the tickets,
what a shocking announcement I'd got..
the train actually would have gone at 4.05 pm..
and we were screaming together after we had run along the Malioboro Street to the Tugu Station...
hehe
after we'd arrived at Purwosari Station,
we went to the Bus Station at Kerten..
then we went to Salatiga...

That was unforgetable moment we'd had..

LUV U GUYS..
hehe

kangen kamuu :(

setiap hari ak sengaja ato g sengaja terkadang inget kamuu..
ak sebenernya males,sebel,
tapi ak g bisa memungkirinyaa..
hmmm,seandainyaaa g ada beda agama di antara kita,
trus prinsipmu tentang "sebuah status" bisa dinetralisir,
indahhnya ...
tapi lagi2 itu hanya pengandaian dari sesuatu yg g bs ak dapet..
hmmm..

kangennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn...

bener2 kangeeeeeeeeennnn kamuuu....

sumpahh!!
sumprit!!!

tapi y udahlah..
biar blog ini dan pembacanya yg tauuu...
dan Tuhan..

hmm, berdoa ak bisa melewatinya..
tumbuh berproses..
berdiri tegak..
menatap ke depan..
berharap,berdoa,dan berusaha menjaga keseimbangan antara kehidupan dunia dan rohani..
a.k.a
g boleh berpaling dari Tuhan Yesus...

semoga dan ak yakin,
ak bisa melewati ini..
dan membuka hati ini untuk seseorang lain..


SEMANGAT!!!
:)

...dan kita berpisah karena 1 persamaan...

maafkan kali ini
aku harus jujur
kau harus tahu siapa
aku sebenarnya

terpikir dalam benakku
tentang cinta terlarang
selama ini ku pendam

jangan salahkan keadaan ini sayang
semua adalah keterbatasanku saja
tak mampu menjadi yang kau mau
aku mencoba dan aku tak mampu

reff:
tak bisa lagi mencintaimu
dengan sisi lainku
aku tak sanggup menjadi biasa
aku tak sanggup

tak ada satu pun yang mungkin bisa
terima kau seperti aku
ku mohon jangan salahkan aku lagi
ini aku yang sebenarnya

tak mampu menjadi yang kau mau
aku mencoba dan aku tak mampu

repeat reff

maafkan kali ini
aku harus jujur
(Kerispatih - Aku Harus Jujur)

Read more: http://funlirik.com/k/kerispatih/lirik-lagu-kerispatih-aku-harus-jujur/#ixzz0gXftFasT
*courtesy of FunLirik.com
sebuah lagu yang aku dedikasikan buat seseorang..

setiap orang ingin bersama orang yang disayanginya..
begitupun aku,
setiap orang ingin memperjuangkan kisah cintanya..
begitu pula dengan diriku,
tapi setiap orang juga mempunyai pilihannya masing-masing..
dan itulah pilihanku..

jika boleh berandai-andai sesuatu yang tidak mungkin..
aku akan berpikir:
seandainya jika perbedaan agama yang tidak ada di antara kita,
mungkin ak akan terus berjuang..
seandainya kau mengatakan apa yang kau mau,
ak pasti kan mengerti lebih..
seandainya aku tidak takut untuk melangkah,
aku pasti masih ada di sisimu..
seandainya aku tidak minder dengan keluargamu,
pasti aku akan belajar tentang itu..
dan seandainya kau mengerti apa yang aku butuhkan,
bukan yang aku inginkan,
pasti akan lebih baik..

tapi yang ada sekarang adalah lebih dari cukup..
lebih dari cukup baik,,
kita berbeda..
sangat berbeda..
walaupun hanya ada 2 perbedaan..
perbedaan agama dan perbedaan 1 prinsip dasar..
dan kita berpisah karena 1 persamaan..
sama-sama bersikukuh menjaga prinsip dasar kita..
tapi ak bersyukur..
walaupun cara berpisah yang tidak biasa,
tapi aku yakin ini baik untuk semuanya..

terima kasih, AW.

d busy months wanna be

bentar lagi bulan februari bakal selesai..
bulan cinta penuh anugerah..
semuanya menyenangkan..
semuanya membekas di hati..

ga ada yang bikin kecewa..
ga ada yang membuat sedih..
semua indah di tiap waktunya..
:)

mendekati hari-hari terakhir di bulan maret,
hari-hari akhir di bulan februari bener2 berkesan..
hari ini mau nonton ANNUAL DRAMA PERFORMANCE fakultasku,
"A MIDSUMMER'S NIGHT DREAM"
jangan mpe kelewatan nonton yya..
hohoho

trus besok moga2 libur..
hehehe

trus jumat bersama MASGERRATT mo tour ke solo - jogja..
yuuuuuuuuuhuuuuuuuuuu..

habis itu pulang ke sala3 lagi hari sabtunya,,
ato minggu yya??
undecided yet..
harusnya ada latian drama di gereja sihh,,
tapi kayakknya dipindah hari senin..

hbs itu dari senin mpe jumat urusan kuliah..
sedangkan hari jumat ma minggu latian drama..
trus tiap hari sabtu di bulan maret LDK di kampus..

setelah itu hari2ku akan disibukkan dengan tugas2 panitia LoVED mpe hari H..
tanggal 14 - 16 april 2010..


walopun sibuk,tetep seneng karena dengan sibuk masalah pribadi jadi terasa lebih ringan..
hmmm..masalah cinta?
cinta??
butuh butuh ga butuh saat ini..
tapi aku g akan pernah nolak kapan,dimana,dan dengan siapa cinta itu datang..
I believe in God,
He has the best way and time to send my love..
(gara2 kemaren ada cowo ga pny sopan santun bertanya apa ak ga butuh cinta,jadi esmosi sendiri)
that's not ur business boy..
hohoho

"Dia" kembaliiii

Akhirnya cintakuu balikk juga,,
selama beberapa hari kita g ketemu,,
sekarang aku melihatmu daN tambah menyayangimu..

lebih dari sebelummnya...

terima kasih Tuhan karena tlah kau pertemukan lagi dengan,,
"kacamataku"






:)
ilank : 20 februari 2010
ketemu : 23 februari 2010

The busy-heavy-happy saturday :)

KRINGGGG!!!
bella swan palsu is calling me .
jam berapa ni bell???!!
helllooowww...

bella-temanku yang aneh itu-udah di depan kos wiw..
she has already taken flowers from Gua Kereb at 4 am wif putri,and AKTRANS's persons...
Galuh,Wiw,and me wake up wif feeling of laziness...
:)
we arrange the flowers which are being sold in the graduation ceremony..

there are :


* joe
* ci jess
* dudu
* mas triyono
* lutfi
* mb tata
* arif
* ara
* bella
* putri
* galuh
* wiw
ada juga yg ngebantuin jualan bunga ma minuman di acara wisuda kita kemaren, kaya :
* ngepet
* dita
* ninda
* estu
* ncus
* jessica 09
* tiwik
* lina 09
* kris

what stunning team we are ...
hohohoho

ternyata dari jam 5 pagi mpe jam 3 sore kerasa banget kerjasama tim-nya,
tapi kerasa juga capenya..
hohoho..

tapi walopun ak bagian pubdecdoc..
mbantuin anak2 usda jg bagian dr kerjasama the whole team kan??
semangat yya buat usdanya..
biar uangnya tambah banyak..
hehe...

SUPER DUPER

hari ini tu bener2 hari super duber sibuk bin abieeeessss...
diawali dari bangun jam setengah enam dengan dikagetkan dengan kelakuan Bella(bong) yg berteriak ga jelas itu..
trus kita(bella,ak,wiw,galuh) berangkat dari rumah galuh jam stengah 7 mo lanjut ke pasar kembangnya bandungan..
setelah selesai bertransaksi,ak ma bella misah dari the other couple nie..

Tim 1 : ak ma bella -> lewat Bawen
sedangkan
Tim 2 : galuh ma wiw -> lewat banyubiru

sekitar jam 8nan ak sampe kos dan bukannya langsung mandi,
malah ol dulu,
update blog,
baru 1 jam sebelum kelas
ak berada di kamar mandi.
:)

jam 10 ak udah di angkot nie friends,
trus jam 11 masuk kelas TEFL nya c wemmy...
hohoho

krucuk krucuk
panggilan darurat di perutku membahana..
oh nooooooooooooo!! ak belum makan dr pagi....
mana kemaren malem salah pesen makanan yg super pedes...
ohhh mannnn!!!!

balik lagi ke hari ini,
habis ak kelas,
ak ke atm bank x,
ngirim transferan yg butuh buktinya buat dikirimin,
eh malah kertasnya g nongol2..
y udeh ak langsung ke mbaknya,
dibantu deh..
trus nye-can di Tiara Jaya yg unik bgt ternyata..
hehe

hbs itu ak ke lantai 5 dimana ak harus nae tangga gr2 liftnya mati..
huf huf huf...

sesampainya ku di sana,
buka laptop,
cari koneksi wifi,
kirim scan bukti transfer lwt email,
kekirim!!!
akhirnya,,,
satu tugas selesai sudah...
hohohoho

lanjut mbantuin temen2 yg pada ngrangkai bunga di kos wiw,
kerasa bgt suasana kebersamaannya,
ada mb tata,ncus,bella,kris,ak,galuh,wiw,dita,dan bintang tamu kita,"estu"..
hehehe

unforgetable moment deh..
:)

trus habis itu RAPAT DI GEREJA PAULUS MIKI,
buat VISUALISASI KISAH SENGSARA TUHAN YESUS,
g kenal sapa2 kecuali mas indra ma dita...
besok minggu ada latihan di senjoyo...
moga2 dita ikut..
si sekar ikut lho...
hmmm,senang rasanya bisa ngajak orang lain,
gabung buat pelayanan,,
I love you My Lord, JESUS CHRIST...
:)

now,it's time to go to sleep,
cause tomorrow early morning,
I've to help my friends,USDA team,to sell some things in graduation ceremony.,.
see you again guys...

one night in Bandungan

hohoho...
spending the previous night at my friend's house, Galuh, wif Bella and Wiw.
i was numb,
Really cold there..

we watched movie, Look for a star, where andy lau acted.
it was a great and romantic people,
so meaningful and touched our hearts..
:'(

the value was :
whenever you fall in love with somebody, no matter what (s)he is,
if you do love him/her,
just catch the star (the opportunity-red).
Because it comes one and you never know when you'll get another.
No matter who you are,
when you feel terrible in loving somebody,
it means you do love him/her.

and this morning,we're going to "pasar kembang"..
hehehehe..
we bought flowers to be sold tomorrow on graduation ceremony at SWCU..
(when will I be there?? nguknguk..)

but,overall,this short holiday makes me happy and I get more spirit to pass the day...
:-)

-GOOD FRIDAY and FREE-DAY GUYS-

~ START WITH NEW PASSION ~

g ad yg begitu spesial d hari valentine taon ini
cuma ad yg terasa baru di diriku
yapp,
sebuah harapan baru yang terukir antara hati,jiwa,dan hidupku..

NEW PASSION of LIFE and LOVE

kenapa baru muncul sekarang ak jg g ngeh..
kenapa ak baru bangkit dari perpisahanku dg mr.A?
but it's the result of my effort to get a better life without a man who doesn't care to me ever for a true love..
so the big questions that hav been come up over my head is,

Is it fair for me to stay waiting a man who won't let his heart and his life to care to me?
Did he miss me like I miss him?
Has he ever loved me in true love?

So,I start to throw away memories of him in order to try to get better goals in my life.

he's not my bad memory,
he's not my burden,
not at all,
he is my history,
he is my teacher for 3 months for love,life,and religion's point of view..
even he made me sad,cry,and sometimes got angry,
he's still the good man until right now..

it doesn't mean dat I wanna back,
it's just my honest words to show dat I still respect to him..

but the point is he doesn't wanna contact me again,
so it will be the way to say what I want to say to him (if he had a time to read and want to)

Loving somebody is not about it's wrong or right,
but it's all about caring and trying the best for you and him,
both of you..
if the best is you and him become together,
so you must struggle for it..
but if it reverses,
so ending your relationship up is not a bad ones,hha?
hehe

Love won't stop when you broke up with your PACAR...
BELIEVE ME!!
You'll feel your decision is right or not,
right after you made it.
There are signs dat God gives to us for every single decision we've made..

So,let your heart find its soulmate in God's way..
IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL IN GOD
^.^

~ a regrettable thing rite now ~

penyesalanku yang ingin ku tebus dalam waktu dekat adalah ...

aktif di kegiatan katolik ...

ak benar-benar nyesel dulu jaman ak SMA ak ikut LTC ISKS tp hbs itu g aktif lg..
(what's for diy you did that??!!!now you regret it rite???!!)

yaa I regret it so much and too much...
I miss my ISKS's friends..
the bond of us,
I'd shattered that by myself!!
what stupid I was...

I felt it again when I met my friend,
some of the member of ISKS (I dunno what angkatan we were, that I remember is we joined the LTC at Regina Pacis (URSULIN) Junior High School) :)

She is Aphyn..
Deata .
and Cumi too...

I miss you guys..
miss the ISKS..

Sometimes I wanna blame my school,
which sometimes bounds the students' activity outside the intern programs..
and it affected me too..
how could it be???
IT WAS!!
I was the mass coordinator,
I was the lead of prayer's schedules everyday..
I was the lead of TAIZE's program..
so when was the time for me to have society outside my school???!
yaa I know I couldn't blame those on my school..
it was more on me..
I couldn't arrange my schedule approriately..
but I thanked to my school that had given a lot of things that built up my spiritual life..
:)

Even though it's too late to miss ISKS and my friends, also the activities,
I do wanna say,
I do miss you all..
:-*

mwuahh mwuahhh...
hehehe